{ Baker 2 months }

 It's amazing how times truly does fly! I know I'll say this each month as I write your little monthly updates, but I honestly feel like I just came home from the hospital with you. Has it really been two months?

•  By far, my favorite things you've started doing recently are smiling & cooing. Each morning when Daddy gets you out of your crib and brings you to me, you give him the biggest smile and a little baby chuckle. It's like you're so happy to see him and so grateful to get out of your crib! You also smile at Mommy, especially when you get a diaper change! Something about having your pants and diaper off just sends a wave of happiness over you! And who can blame you? It's free to be nakey! 
• You love your toys, especially the little colorful toys that hang from your car seat handle. The noise they make intrigues you, and to be honest, I love the sound it makes too! It's fun to see you stare at them so intently, really concentrating on the color and textures, and then smile and laugh when we shake them.  
• It's so fun seeing you kick your arms when you're really excited about something. Your eyes get really wide and you just go wild. You especially do this when I get up to nurse you. The minute you hear your door open and hear my voice, you immediately stop fussing. You know what's coming and you can't hide your excitement for a little midnight snack!
• You still look like mini version of Daddy, but you did get my eyes! I'm 99% sure you're going to have brown eyes! Hallelujah!
• I also love, love, love your red hair! I never would have thought I'd have a little red head, but you surprised us all! I can't wait to see what a handsome guy you're turning into! Watch out girls!
• We finally got a handle of your reflux. You used to cry and cry nursing and pull away sweating and clenching your little fists. Now that you're on some baby antacid, you nurse much better which makes us both happy.
• Speaking of nursing, you still love to poop while on the boob. Silly boy. You are also as loud as ever as you nurse- you love your milky time!
• You had your first cold this month. As hard as I tried to shield you from the world to keep you from getting sick, you caught a cold (in your eye of all places)! You're a champ at taking your medicine though, which is a relief for me!
• You are such a big boy! You weighed 13.4 lbs at your last appointment and you've nearly grown out of your 3 month old clothes! 

I just love you so much Baker! I feel so blessed to be your mom and can't wait to see you grow up! (Okay, I can wait...but I do look forward to new experiences with you!)

xoxo,
Momma

my little red

{ oh poop! }

A few days ago I noticed Baker's right eye was getting a little red and more "goopy" than normal. I thought maybe he scratched his eye and so I didn't think much of it. Well, when I went into his room Monday night to feed him, his eye looked awful. You know those eye boogers? Well, they were yellowy and icky and all over his eye. I freaked out and while he nursed I googled "eye infection in infant" and got the crap scared out of me by the response the internet fed me. (Why I do this, I don't know. Note to self- don't use WebMD or Google your childs symptoms and freak out until the actual doctor confirms it!)

Anyway, the next morning, I called our pediatrician first thing and made an appointment to get it checked out. Our appointment was at 10:30 and I noticed Baker hadn't really pooped yet - and this kid is a pooper! I attributed his fussiness to the fact that he hadn't pooped and spent a few minutes doing kicky legs and patting his stomach to get things moving. Usually this does the trick, but still, his diaper remained poopless.

10:30 came and we arrived on time to our appointment, checked in, and then sat in the waiting room. We waited and waited and waited to be called back. Every time we've been to the doctor we've had to wait at least 30 minutes, which is so frustrating. (It might be time to find a new pediatrician).

We finally got called back to see the doctor and the nurse had me put Baker on the scale and then she had me move him to the exam table to take his temperature. I started to lift up his shirt, so she could access his armpit, but she said she needed to take it rectally. They'd never done it that way before and  usually they use the little ear thermometer. I told her he hadn't pooped yet and she said, "Oh, that's okay! This usually gets things moving!"

And boy oh boy did it! She probably had the thermometer in his bum for about a minute when he exploded. I'm talking projectile poop all over the exam table and all over her hand. She jumped about a foot in the air and I was trying so hard not to crack up. I apologized but secretly I was thinking, "HA! Payback for all those times we had to wait!!" Baker seemed pretty proud of himself and was happy as a clam after that!

Luckily, the nurse had a good attitude about it and laughed it off. I cleaned Baker up and waited (again) for the doctor. We found out the poor kid caught a cold in his eye (I didn't even know that was possible!) and it turned into pink eye. Luckily there are drops to help clear it up and he'll be fine.

Funny little pooper guy!

{ Baker 1 Month }

 

Oh my gosh- I had no idea writing this would make me so emotional! Little man, you are getting so big and it's passing by so fast! I can't believe it's been an entire month since you were born!

- You're such a big, strong boy! From the first day you were born, you've held up your little head! In the last month, you've also started to sit up for a few seconds when we hold you, and you love to try to "stand" when I hold you up straight and put your feet on my legs.

- Nursing has become second nature to you. You caught on so quick, which was such a relief to me! I love the time I spend with you nursing. You make the sweetest and funniest noises when you eat. I wish I could record the sighs and grunts you make while you nurse. You definitely vocalize when you're enjoying your meal! Sometimes you get "crazy head" when you're really hungry and your frantically looking for something to latch on to, moving your head from side to side like you're starving. You eventually find what you're looking for and then you're happy.

-So far, you love your car seat and fall asleep in it the minute we put you in it. Let's hope this lasts! You also like car rides and going on walks in the stroller.

- You know your momma's voice and immediately turn your head when you're awake and hear me speak. My favorite time of the day is when you're awake. I hold you up, facing me, and we talk. I sing you silly songs I make up or we play kissy toes (when you push your feet up to my face and I kiss your feet). Your expressions are priceless, and even though you can't speak back, I know we're communicating in our special way. 

- Everyone who knows your dad knows that you are your father's son. I like to say you're his "mini me". Daddy is one handsome fella, so I'm happy you look like him! I think you're getting momma's brown eyes though! You also move all around in your sleep - another trait you picked up from daddy! I'll put you down for a nap in your crib, and when I check on you, you've moved into a completely different position. Little bed monkey.

 - You're our little squirt. A nickname bestowed upon you after countless diaper changes. When the cool breeze of fresh air hits your bum during a diaper change, you can't help but pee (we've gotten used to covering your little wee during a diaper change to avoid getting sprayed) or you squirt a little poop while you're being wiped. You like to keep us on our toes. And while we're on the topic, it seems your favorite time to poop is when you're nursing. You get a very serious look on your face, stop sucking, and then bam, you poop and go right back to eating. Silly guy.

- Bathy time is your favorite activity so far. I'll never forget your first bath. I was so nervous, but you handled it like a champ and put momma at ease. You love the warm water and even love having your hair washed. I can't wait until you can splash around and interact more!

- You hate lotion and cry anytime I put it on you. Even if it's warm, you still squirm and cry. You also hate beanies or anything on your head, but you love to have your hair played with! Nothing relaxes you more than when momma runs her fingers over the top of your head.

Baker, you have changed my life in ways I could never have imagined. You're such a good baby and have brought so much joy and love into our lives. I can't wait to see what the future holds.

Love,
Momma

{ Baker's Nursery }

I must admit, when I found out we were expecting, I was so excited - not just for a baby, but to decorate a nursery! I could hardly wait to find out what we were having so I knew what direction I wanted to take as far as colors go! (Although designing a gender neutral nursery would be fun!) 

When we found out we were having a boy, we instantly knew his name. Baker, for those of you who don't know, is a family name. It's my mom's maiden name and I've always thought it would be a great first name. I told Andrew years ago that I loved the name Baker and he immediately thought it was cool too. Because the name is fairly unique, we kept it on the down-low until he arrived. Our family only knew his name started with a B, and I knew I wanted to incorporate his monogram in the nursery. 

As you can see, I was definitely inspired by the chevron print. I knew I wanted gray and white walls with hints of turquoise throughout the room. I didn't want it too matchy matchy though, which is why I added pops of other colors in his quilt & in the artwork.

 

 

I wanted to make a quilt for my little guy and found a great tutorial for a chevron quilt on Pinterest. Click here for the link. It was my first quilt and it turned out fabulous! I'll post the details of my projects later- for now this is all about the nursery!

 

 Awhile ago on one of my business trips to Boise, I found an adorable, vintage childrens book called The ABC Book that was in great condition. The framed print is a page from that book. The old truck painting was given to Andrew by his artist friend (it's a painting of Andrew's favorite truck), and used to hang in his office (now the nursery). I loved how it looked so we kept it up! And last, the B is for Baker print is from the On To Baby website. You can find the link to the free printable here. I had mine printed at Costco for about $1.

What do you do with all of your cute cards you get from your baby showers? I pulled some of my favorite and used a wire card holder to display them! It's a fun way to display art in an unconventional way! 

 The changing table hutch is one of my favorite finds, well, besides his crib! I got Bakers crib from my parents neighbors who were having a yard sale. I actually bought it before I was even married! How could I pass up a $60 crib?! And one from Pottery Barn? It's traveled around with Andrew and I from house to house and then sat in our attic for years. When we brought it down, all we had to do was wipe the dust off and set it up! I love it!

The changing table hutch was a classified find. I called the lady and offered her $20 more than what she was asking because it was exactly what I was looking for and I had to have it! After a coat of white & turquoise paint, and it was perfect!

The crate shelves are just that- stacked crates! Cheap, fun, easy shelving for a small area!

Where I found the other items...

Glider: Target 

Curtain Rod: Pottery Barn 

Curtains: Ikea

Shelf above crib: Ikea

Frame with ABC Print: IkeaLamp Shade: Ikea

Crates: Joann

Crib Sheets: Target

Quilt Fabric: Down Under by Mint Blossom

Crib Skirt Fabric: Quilting Cottage

{ Baker's birth story }

I started writing this when I was in the hospital and like all of you know, when you get home life takes over and I put this on the back burner.

I really should have finished writing this while everything was fresh in my mind, so while Baker is napping and before too much times passes, I wanted to write about the week leading up to his birth & what happened when the day finally came.

The last few weeks of my pregnancy had been rough, with my feet, ankles, legs, & hands swelling up like crazy & my blood pressure rising. I went in for my regular weekly appointment on February 7th, and while we were there, the doctor asked us if anyone had talked to us about when we'd deliver (I see a team of doctors instead of just one). Andrew and I looked at each other like "Um, no...." and we told the doctor we were just planning on delivering when I went into labor. My doctor then told me that due to my high blood pressure and the levels of protein in my urine, I was heading towards pre-eclampsia. He thought I should deliver on the 15th. 

All I could think was "WHAT?!" I immediately called my mom, excited but also anxious. Delivering on the 15th meant that my baby would be 2 weeks early. Was he ready? Was I ready? I trusted my doctors though and headed over to labor and delivery for a quick non stress test. Since baby was fine, they sent me home with 2 big ol' empty jugs, 2 toilet "hats", and told me I had to track my urine for the next 24 hours. Because capturing and keeping each drop of urine ice cold isn't really conducive with work (would you want a jug of pee sitting in ice on your desk?!) I called my boss and let her know I wouldn't be in the next day. I also told her that because of the swelling and high blood pressure, my doctors wanted me to stay off my feet and basically said I shouldn't return to work until further notice (darn it, right?)

So I went home, began the urine test (which really wasn't as hard as I thought it would be) and relaxed as much as I could. Hearing that my baby would be coming sooner than later, all I could think about were all the things I had left to do. I still hadn't gotten around to doing the binding on his quilt for his room, my house was a mess (I totally wanted to deep clean before he came), I didn't have a diaper bag, my bags weren't packed, etc etc. Looking back now, they weren't really big deal things- I mean, it's not like I didn't have  car seat or a place for him to sleep, but still, I hate feeling unprepared. On top of that, Andrew took a last minute trip to Dallas for work. We knew the baby wasn't coming before Friday and I figured I'd be fine while he was gone. He left on Saturday and was supposed to come on Thursday night. One day before I was to deliver. (I know, I know...what were we thinking!?)

You've heard the term, when it rains it pours, right? Well on Monday, I had another appointment with my doctor to verify that things were still okay and that Friday was still the date. Right as I was leaving for my appointment, I heard water running in my living room. Not a good sign. I opened up the utility closet and saw that my water heater was leaking like crazy- the overflow pipe was gushing water and while it was draining into the overflow like it's supposed to, the overflow was leaking & water was getting everywhere. I quickly called my dad and asked if that was normal. He said it wasn't (duh Shan) and offered to call plumbers. Then I called Andrew in a panic as I headed to my appointment. I told him I thought it would be okay while I was gone (the water wasn't leaking into our living room floor yet but it wasn't looking good). I quickly went to my appointment, verified that I was still going to have a baby on Friday, but they wanted to do one more non-stress test that day. Overwhelmed, I called my mom and started crying, "My water heater is broken and I have to go to the hospital for a NST! I need someone! Andrew is in Texas!" My poor mom interpreted that as "my water broke and I'm going to the hospital" and told me she'd head down right then. I called Andrew crying and told him I couldn't handle what was going on and he needed to get on the next flight home. While he worked on that, he called his dad who came down to help me fix my water heater. My mom, dad, & father in law showed up at the same time, and what could have been an expensive fix ended up being pretty minor. My mom took me to the hospital for my NST while the dad's fixed the water heater. The NST showed everything was fine - phew - and Andrew was heading home the next morning. (Really, what was I thinking letting him go on a business trip the week I was supposed to give birth? Live and learn, right?!)

When friends and family caught word that the baby was coming sooner than later, they asked if I needed anything. Normally, I would tell them I was fine, but this time I actually took them up on their offers! I asked my sister in laws to help me clean my house and they were more than willing! It was so nice to know that I'd have a nice, clean, organized house to come home to after I got home from the hospital. There was also so much I hadn't gotten done yet. Minor things, but still - like sewing my quilt, boppy cover, car seat cover, putting up drapes in Baker's nursery, etc. Like I said, small things, but I still felt unprepared.

The night before Baker arrived was bittersweet. I feel silly, but honestly, thinking back to that night, I still get a little teary. Andrew helped me pack my bag for the hospital, and as we crawled into bed I started crying. I thought about how it was the last time my little guy was going to be in my stomach. There's something so intimate about feeling your baby move inside you. I was excited to hold him in my arms, but after spending so much time - just he and I - I was emotional. Then I started thinking about how long it had been just Andrew and I. When I explained why I was crying, Andrew cried with me. They were happy, thankful tears - we had been hoping and praying for this for years and knowing we'd finally meet our little guy the next day was so sweet. We had our last family prayer with just the two of us and thanked the Lord for blessing our lives and then went to bed. I hardly slept that night, anxious about what was to come.

The Big Day...
We were scheduled to be at the hospital at 6:30am. I woke up at 5:00, got ready, & headed over to the hospital with everything we'd need. I figured if I got there at 6:30, we'd probably have a baby by 3:00pm at the latest...boy was I wrong!
Shortly after we arrived, they started the pitocin and broke my water at 7:30. I hadn't gotten my epidural yet, because I wanted to experience labor pains (call me crazy) and the sensation from having my water break was unlike anything I've ever experienced. Pretty much like peeing your pants but the water literally gushed out and just kept coming. I was amazed at how much fluid there was (TMI? Get used to it...)! Any time I'd adjust myself or laugh, more would come out, which would make me laugh more.

Around 10:30, I was starting to feel some contractions. Nothing major- just small cramping. It felt like menstrual cramps and I still didn't feel like I wanted the epidural yet. It wasn't until the nurses came in to hook me up to the internal monitors that I realized pain killers would be nice. (Since baby boy kept moving around, the external monitors weren't tracking his heart rate like they should.) They attempted to insert them and ohmuhgosh...I about died. I thought being "checked" for dilation hurt...oh no. This was excruciating. They got the wire in that monitored my contractions, but they couldn't connect the other wire to baby's head in the right spot. After trying for what seemed like forever (it was actually only a few minutes), they gave up and would try again in a bit.
When they left, I broke down, started crying and told Andrew I was ready for the epidural. I felt like it took the anesthesiologist forever to get there and even the epidural hurt. He was having trouble getting the catheter in the right spot in my spine and feeling him feel around hurt. Ouch. Finally, they got it in and within a few minutes, I was way more comfortable. It wasn't long after that when the nurses tried the internal monitors again and got them connected to the baby.

Every hour or so, the nurse would come in and check to see how far I'd progressed. Things were moving very slowly, but baby was doing fine, so they upped the pitocin just a bit to help me progress faster. At 3:00 I was finally dilated to a 5 and they said usually it's pretty fast from there & normally you progress about a centimeter each hour. We should have a baby here by 9:00, I thought! Sadly, that didn't happen.

Around 5:00 I started feeling the contractions pretty bad. I pressed the button for the epirdural a few times for another dose of medicine, but the pain wasn't subsiding. Finally, we called the nurse in. My epidural had run out and the alarm on the bag that warns you when the medicine is getting low didn't go off. At that point, I could feel everything and I was having some pretty intense contractions. My mom coached me through them, while I tried breathing through them and cried. To ya'll who do this naturally, kuddos to you! I think I could have managed the pain better, had I not had the pitocin and had I been prepared for it, but in the moment, it was awful. The anesthesiologist came back in, fixed me back up, and all was well.

Finally, at 10:30 at night, my doctor came in to talk to me. He explained that even though baby was doing well, I was still at a 5 and even felt like I was starting to swell up. He said I was more like a 4 1/2. It was time for us to start talking about a c-section.

A lump immediately formed in my throat and I did my best to not start bawling until after he left the room. Then I broke down. A c-section was not part of my plan at all. I was exhausted and terrified. The doctor suggested we talk it over and have him come back in an hour to check again. My dad was there and he and Andrew gave me a blessing. I immediately felt comforted and knew that while this wasn't in my plan, things would be okay, and the c-section was the route we needed to take to get him there safely.

The doctor came back in, checked me (I was a 4 by then- definitely swelling) and they prepared me for the c-section. The rest is a bit blurry. I was honestly so tired and keeping my eyes open felt like torture. I remember them wheeling me back to the operating room and a new anesthesiologist (who was so amazing and so so sweet) talked to me about what they were going to do. He stayed with me the whole time and assured me that everything was going to be okay. I'm so grateful for his help and assurance during that time! Andrew was the only one allowed in the room as far as family went and I made sure he took lots of pictures. He was also a great support and kept telling me I was doing great.

When they got me on the operating table, they put the screen up and started the procedure. I couldn't really feel them cutting me but I could feel the pressure. And after laboring for 18 hours, I thought it hurt like hell. After about 5 minutes, I felt some movement and then heard the most amazing sound I will ever hear - my baby's first cry! He was not a happy boy, going from a cozy, warm environment to a bright, cold room! They told us he was a boy (which we knew, but it was still a nice confirmation!) and I saw them carry him over to the table to get cleaned up and I couldn't stop crying or laughing. I was so happy! I just wish I could have held him in my arms right after he was born. But I was grateful he was okay and healthy.

 Because he was posterior & situated funny inside me, he had such a little cone head from the pressure on my cervix! Poor baby! He was 9 pounds & 21 inches long - 2 weeks early! Can you imagine if I'd gone to 40 weeks!?

 Once he was wrapped up, the nurse brought him to me. I couldn't believe how beautiful and big he was! I kissed him and just stared in awe at this little one that Andrew and I created. It was amazing.

 While they stitched me back up, Andrew took him back into the labor and delivery room to introduce him to the rest of our family. When they wheeled me back in, we announced his name to everyone. I tried to breast feed that night, but I was so tired and couldn't stay awake. I had them take him to the nursery for the night so I could sleep. At this point it was about 1:30am. 

 Andrew was amazing through the whole ordeal. So supportive and loving. It was love at first sight for both of us! All in all, things definitely didn't go as I planned or hoped, but I'm so grateful for all the support we received for good doctors! Mostly I'm grateful for our healthy, beautiful baby boy.

Aren't my guys handsome?

{ he's here! }

We are so in love!

{ pregnancy diary: week 35, 36, 37ish }

Oh who am I kidding- this poor blog has been neglected and I've done a terrible job writing about my pregnancy. 

Truth be told, I feel like I've had it rough! I've been sick non stop since September, due mainly to the awful sick season we've had (colds, flu, strep, etc) and the dang inversion (remember when our air quality was one of the worst in the world?!). I had a bad gallbladder attack and spend a little time in labor and delivery for that! Then there was the time I totally biffed it and landed on my 35 week pregnant belly (picture someone dropping, arms out front, to slide down a slip n slide, except instead of a slip n slide, it was concrete and the water was frozen ice). I also spend a little time in L&D for that fun flop. And finally, I've swelled up like a summer sausage. At first I thought it was just pregnancy swelling, but after my feet, ankles, and legs kept getting bigger and bigger, and my blood pressure started getting higher and higher, we realized I had a little pre-eclampsia. More time in L&D and a few tests later, my doctor has decided to induce me this Friday. I'll be 38 weeks exactly and little guy is measuring big, so I'm sure we'll be fine. 

Really though, for all that I've been through, I wouldn't change a thing. I still can't believe that I'm pregnant. 

I can't believe that in 4 short days, I'll be holding this tiny human that's been growing in my belly. I will finally see the face that me and Andrew created. 

I'm going to be a mom! 

Any last bits of advice?

{ nursery design }

I think I'm pretty set on a color scheme for little guy's nursery. Different shades of gray, aqua, & yellow. What do you think?

(The links to the pictures are on my pinterest baby board)

{pregnancy diary: week 21}

 

• That's right! We're having a boy!!! Andrew and I were both thinking it's a girl and we were pleasantly surprised. We went in last Friday for the ultrasound and all of the sudden, I saw a glimpse of something on the screen and said, "Is that what I think it is?" Sure enough it was! Our little guy was a little camera shy and kept moving his hands down there to hide, so it was a little tough to tell at first, but he's all boy!
• With that said, I can't wait to start on the nursery! Finally! Have I decided on a color scheme? No, but at least I know where to start!
• I'm still emotional as ever and feeling like a crazy lady at times. My sweet friends who've gone through this are quick to reassure me that I'm not the only one who's felt this way and it's normal. 
• We bought a body pillow last week. I have no idea why I waited so long - it's glorious to sleep with and I'm so much more comfortable!
• My new cravings are cheese (havarti, gouda, gruyere, sharp cheddar, & brie are my current favs) and pickled asparagus spears. I was wandering around Costco and found two huge jars of pickled asparagus for $8. Needless to say, I was in heaven and ate one jar in less than a week. Yum! I still love milk too but the potato craving has started to subside. 
• I'm really starting to show & feel this little guy moving around more and more. Andrew still hasn't been able to feel him- hopefully soon!
• Everyone keeps asking if we've thought of names- of course we have! However, we're keeping our pick on the down low until it's set in stone (aka written on the birth certificate). I'm hoping people will be respectful and if they don't like it to keep opinions to themselves! ;)
• I've already started nesting and I'm trying to de-clutter and organize before it's too late! 
• I can't wait to meet this little guy! Seeing him and feeling him move has made this all the more realistic- I can't believe this is really happening!